Dear human drivers,
You like to talk about the “car wars.” You claim that drivers are singled out for abuse, that local governments are making transportation impossible, and that the federal government is making it harder for low-income people to buy cars.
Try being a mouse.
Today, war rages in cities and towns across North America (except Alberta). It’s a “battle against rats in cars.” Today, motorists aim to completely eliminate rats from their cars. The problem with cars, drivers say, is not that they dirty or hurt people. That means there are rats.
As temperatures dropped, the media was filled with reports of rodents taking over vehicles. In November 2023, Chicago’s ABC 7 ran a headline that read, “Chicago rats chew through car wires and build nests under hoods. Chicago rats chew through car wires and build nests under hoods.” Posted. What you can do. ” A Washington, D.C., station recently warned its viewers: There’s a rat in the car. ”
The Wall Street Journal published an article about university professor Tom Marion, who “survived about four rodent car break-ins.” The 62-year-old has tried rat repellents, peppermint oil and steel wool, all without success. “They’ll find you,” he told the paper, “and they all know each other and talk to each other.”
Full disclosure: I’m a rat, specifically a Norway rat, legal name “Rattus Norvegicus.” And if you really want to know the truth, you can say, yes, we know each other and we talk to each other, yes, we will find you. We are smart. We rats like to think of humans as old-fashioned rats. We can also say that we like cars, trucks, and almost all types of automobiles, ideally served with some kind of seasoning or sauce.
How did cars become tasty and food for rats?
First, some background. A little more than a decade ago, automakers began using soy-based insulation in wiring. Soy-based wiring is cheaper to manufacture and better for the environment. how do i put this? Imagine if the traffic corn tasted like buffalo wing sauce. You can’t walk a block without seeing two or three people licking them. Soybean-based wire is Actinidia for rats. If you don’t like us eating your car, don’t line the inside of it with delicious soy-coated wire. Then the pandemic happened. Restaurants were closed due to the lockdown. Eat at a restaurant. we eat at a restaurant. Notice a pattern? So we stayed home and practiced social distancing in your car, I am driven less.
Why is there so much rat hatred among drivers?
I think it’s because humans are trained to hate rats, and the same applies to rats in cars. We are held responsible for the Black Death, even though poor human hygiene was largely the cause. And that was in the 14th century. Can’t we just let it go?
Traditionally, we mice weren’t cute. If a panda was chewing on car wires, he’d probably post a video of himself chewing on a Porsche or Cadillac on TikTok. That’s ironic. Everyone, what have pandas done for you so far? there is nothing. On the other hand, we rats have been carrying a heavy burden for humans since the invention of science. Did you or your loved one take any medications this year? Well, thanks to the rats who “volunteered” for drug testing. Better yet, open the glove compartment and let one of us inside.
Besides, is it really weird that rats like cars?
We are essentially the same species. We are both warm-blooded animals. We live where you live and eat what you eat. We suffer from the same diseases, have the same basic organs and physiology, and use hormones to control our body chemistry. Do you believe in reincarnation? I hate to say it too much, but many of you will come back as rats (and the rest as pigeons).
Not only do rats like to drive, but so do we. Researchers at the University of Richmond taught rats to drive a car. According to the study, “The research team created a small rat car from a clear plastic food container on wheels, with an aluminum floor and three copper rods that served as handles.” A total of 17 rats were trained to drive in a rectangular arena. Rats that passed driver’s training were rewarded with Froot Loops. ”
Professor of Behavioral Neuroscience Kelly Lambert said: “We already knew that rodents could recognize objects, push bars and find ways around mazes, but rather than controlling a moving vehicle. “I wondered if rats could learn complex tasks.”
In fact, you can even eat the inside of a Prius.
Here are some tips: The next time you decide what to insulate your car’s wiring with, don’t choose fluted loops.
Why not join forces? Rats are great pets. We produce better passengers than most. We don’t swear or suffer from road rage. We are good listeners. Get inspired by this Minnesota photographer who found a mouse in his car and decided to let it stay. He named her Morticia (her real name was Janice, but she could be anything). She is now his car friend.